6 WAYS TO MANAGE ANGRY OUTBURSTS BY THE ELDER WITH DEMENTIA

Mike was visiting his daughter Marge and her family for the 4th of July holiday. Mike had called ahead and insisted he was bringing all the food. He arrived during a heavy downpour, and Marge standing on her porch urged him to stay in the car till the rain stopped. Mike proceeded by demonstrating an inability to reason on something so simple as staying out of the rain, and then immediately becoming angry, thus began the unhappy holiday.

Mike stated “No one was going to tell him what to do.” And he proceeded to get out of his car, struggling with his walker as he tried to carry his groceries to the porch. Mike not only wasn’t going to be told what to do, but he very much wanted to direct his daughter. When Marge said she would be waiting for the rain to stop before moving groceries, Mike went right into his now frequent response of “just do what I tell you!”

Starting the visit all wet did nothing to improve Mike’s mood. From this unfortunate beginning, Mike proceeded to engage his teenage grandchildren in conversation regarding the dishonesty of the healthcare industry.  Saying everyone in healthcare is crooked and only in it for the money. Mike’s son-in-law a dentist, quickly became frustrated with Mike’s outrageous behavior and soon was asking Mike to leave.

6 Ways to manage angry outbursts by the elder with dementia:

  • realize that this is an episode of agitated behavior and that in order to manage this well you need to be in control of your own emotions
  • take care of yourself first – whether it is with taking some deep breaths or whatever you normally do that helps you to remain calm
  • be aware that arguing or trying to reason with the unreasonable person with dementia is not possible
  • remove the “audience” it is harder for Mike to back down from outrageous things he says if the whole family is there, and seeing himself as the father figure, he wants to save face
  • instead of several family members entering into this argument making Mike think everyone is against him, only one person should engage in de-escalating the situation
  • be respectful and avoid becoming defensive, the angry words even if directed at you are not about you

Virginia Garberding RN

Certified in Gerontology and Restorative Nursing

DELUSIONAL NEIGHBOR – EARLY DEMENTIA

Bob considers himself a lover of animals, he feels all the little animals in his community need him. Bob would be amazed to know he is considered a "delusional neighbor." Bob is well known in his condo community as the owner who is bringing an … [Continue reading]

REASONS FOR SUDDEN DEMENTIA – DELIRIUM AND DEMENTIA Part III

As stated in Part I of this series on Sudden Dementia, the key here is to have the diagnosis, of delirium. Once the patient has the diagnosis, the nursing home is mandated by Medicare to investigate all of the previously mentioned  probable causes. … [Continue reading]

REASONS FOR SUDDEN DEMENTIA – DELIRIUM AND DEMENTIA Part II

The Center for Medicare requires healthcare professionals to investigate causes and reasons for sudden dementia including these changes: SIGNS OF POSSIBLE DEHYDRATION recent decrease in volume of urine, more concentrated urine or a darker … [Continue reading]

REASONS FOR SUDDEN DEMENTIA – DELIRIUM AND DEMENTIA – Part I

The increase number of people experiencing sudden dementia has caused delirium to be a focus of Medicare. As with everything else the way to capture attention is to create a monetary connection. In this case, Medicare reimbursement for sudden … [Continue reading]

AGGRESSIVE DEMENTIA BEHAVIORS PUSHING, YELLING AND SPITTING

Persons with dementia may at times have difficult behaviors. Behaviors that may cause harm to themselves or others. Aggressive dementia behaviors, apply to pushing, yelling, hitting, grabbing, spitting or even trying to bite the caregiver. Persons … [Continue reading]

DEMENTIA FROM ALCOHOL AND THE FAMILY IN DENIAL

Long before experiencing dementia from alcohol, the alcoholic has spent a life time trying to hide his alcoholism from family, friends and even medical professionals. So when the illness progresses to the dementing stage the  family who is in denial, … [Continue reading]

DEMENTIA STAGES – TIME LINE

While every person with dementia has a different experience and progression. For dementia symptoms that follow the decline due to Alzheimer's disease, these changes can be tracked in the following way. Mild Cognitive Impairment: Very early changes … [Continue reading]

WHAT DOES THE PERSON WITH DEMENTIA NEED?

The person with dementia needs to feel safe, but not in a way that they feel restricted. The person with dementia has a need to understand. The person with dementia has a need to be understood. The person with dementia has a need to be healthy and … [Continue reading]

GETTING LOST IN THE COMMUNITY – WHY DO PEOPLE WITH DEMENTIA WANT TO WALK AWAY?

Harry was out to dinner with his family, and stood up saying he had to go to the bathroom. Soon it was noticed that Harry hadn't returned. When a member of the family went to look for Harry they discovered he was no longer in the building. Two hours … [Continue reading]